There are so many positive strategies and processes to use in managing conflict effectively. And sometimes it’s very important to know how to avoid the pitfalls.
You will enhance your success in finding heart peace if you stay aware of the energies that are the indicators and outcomes of conflict. These energies begin with small contrasts that come from mismatched expectations among people. And there are some mistakes you can avoid making if you know about them before they come up.
Safely and Effectively Avoid these Five Mistakes During Conflict
1. Don’t become detached from the conflict. Stay aware of energies that are the indicators and outcomes of conflict so you can monitor and track them. Your enhanced awareness allows you to maintain more control in effective ways. You really want to have a passionate concern for both the people and the issues within the conflict. Your engagement and genuine concern can motivate others toward solutions.
2. Don’t get caught “awfulizing.” Every conflict has a history that extends beyond the present. And “awfulizing” is the tendency to escalate a situation into its worst-case scenario. One person tries to top the other person’s horrible and awful story. You want to find common ground in what can be done to resolve problems, not in common misery.
3. Don’t let conflict establish your agenda. If you want to be an effective change agent in resolving conflict, you must do the important things and consider delegating the urgent things. Stay aligned with your own agenda, and do those things that only you can do. There will always be distractions and seemingly urgent things that can be done effectively by others.
4. Don’t engage in power struggles. There is a significant relationship between power and authority. Your authority increases when you empower others. Power tends to be perceived as coercive, while authority involves respect. Unless you are prepared to waste time, don’t argue. Unless you are prepared to lose, don’t choose to engage in battles. Taking total responsibility for others’ emotions sets you up to lose in a power struggle.
5. Don’t be sidetracked by the projections of others. Projection is really an emotional release for most people. And sometimes people project their own flaws and weaknesses onto others. Avoid accusations and generalizations. Encourage participation so others can speak safely for themselves. There really is no need for anyone to be reduced to mind reading.
Managing conflict more effectively is a passion for Alberta Fredricksen, a Conflict Guide and Spiritual Life Coach. You can be empowered in your personal and professional conflicts through personal coaching or group facilitations. Check Alberta’s website at www.HeartPeaceNow.com for more FREE resources and articles. Sign up for the Awakened Inner PeaceMaker Program now!